Wednesday, March 16, 2005

Capital Punishment Does Not Need to Kill.

Have you ever committed a misdemeanor? That may give ChoicePoint the legal right to ruin your life forever. No really, FOREVER. He he he, whoa Nellie! When you get to heaven and the Easter Bunny goes over your list of sins it will be cross referenced with the ChoicePoint database. And you thought the idea of them selling your identity to criminals was frightening.

But don't worry if you own shares in this company. First of all they probably have never issued any shares so whatever they sold you was probably printed in crayon on the back of a children's menu and so is already worthless. Secondly, I am sure either the courts or some new law being crafted in secret somewhere as you read this will protect ChoicePoint from any consequences from their actions. People don't screw up this hard, this often and this publicly without government assistance.

Canadians have been concerned recently because "our" Federal government has been using American companies to store our personal data which could potentially be seized by the American government and used against us in the interest of national security without telling us or giving us any recourse. (Nothing serious, just things like sending our citizens to Syria to be tortured without informing the Canadian government - you know, little annoyances) But now it is obvious we have nothing to worry about because the information they will be using against us won't even be true.

I feel much better! But why are my eye mussels doing that jumpy thing again? I have been waiting for my student loan reassessment to be processed so I can afford to start taking my sanity pills again, maybe that is it. Funny how those things take four weeks to work yet they stop working after four days.

(Now where was I... Oh yes!)

...and in conclusion Bush is a putz.


At Thu. Mar. 17, 01:15:00 a.m. 2005, Blogger Robert said...

Ahh…I see that you’ve added cynicism to your other isms.

Bush may be a putz, but he's our putz.

At Thu. Mar. 17, 03:01:00 a.m. 2005, Blogger Apesnake said...

"Bush may be a putz, but he's our putz."

Are you sure? I will refer you to my last post. Bush supports the radical left-wing movement in Canada and is sabotaging the Canadian right. Is this really something he was forthcoming about doing during the last election?

Just how certain are you that Bush has not been taken over by communist North Korea? Look at that vacant stare, the fact that he is nominating someone for the president of the World Bank who has, by all accounts never even even worked as a teller. Bush is under the control of the reds I tell you! They used Pat Buchanan to get him alone in a room and then they put the whammy on him.

Just you wait. In the next months and years he will start to pick the "winning" industries for the economy and use the power of the state to protect them from competition. He will start to say and do things that embarrass the nation.

The whole Alaskan oil drilling plan is a scheme to open a tunnel for the North Korean army to poor out. First they take Alaska, and then, with his communification of Canada complete, your new Stalinist masters will sweep down into Washington state to take over Microsoft.

You just wait and see. I am so confident in my prediction that if, after his term is up, this has not come to pass, I will send you a coupon for 50 cents off a bottle of Pepsi.

The truth is out there.

At Thu. Mar. 17, 03:39:00 p.m. 2005, Blogger Robert said...

Perhaps I should clarify...Bush is a putz, but Kerry is a pussy. I usually like pussy...just not when there’s another penis attached!

It's too bad that X-Files is no more, because your prediction is riveting. But your characterization of Bush is not altogether inaccurate. He’s rather like the late Henry Ford, in that he may not know much, but he hires those who do.

At Fri. Mar. 18, 08:43:00 a.m. 2005, Blogger Apesnake said...

I see Kerry as more of a ganglion then a pussy.

A pussy is a wonderful and useful thing. Ganglia are those things that people assume are useful but no one can really explain why. Also, when you speak of a pussy, there is little ambiguity but there are numerous types of ganglia in the human body so no one knows what you are referring to.

Now for the 2008 race, as much as I would like to see a chick fight between Hill and Condi, the democrats need to be talked into putting up Madeline Albright. She at least has some measure of respect and can find Eastern Europe on a map. Of course, before the election she thought that Bush had found Osama Bin Lambada and was just waiting for a cool moment to bring him out like an episode of the "Jerry Springer" show. Hey if you hold out for a candidate that is completely sane you will never have a president.

Though it might be interesting to see who Hillary's husband gets up to in the White House when he does not have a job to keep him busy.

Condi might win but since she was sent out into the world to win hearts and minds and came back with a box full of hearts and brains she might be seen as kind of scary.

At Fri. Mar. 18, 05:44:00 p.m. 2005, Blogger Robert said...

I’m afraid that Madam Secretary [Albright] will be soiling her Depends by the 2008 election, but I would like to see her senile ramblings in a debate. Alas, we will likely be forced to choose between the Hildabeast and which ever zealot the Republicans nominate, because Condi claims that she’ll not run.

Like FDR, Hillary deserves a third term…"I'm not going to have some reporters pawing through our papers. We are the president." [Hillary Clinton commenting on the release of subpoenaed documents]

At Sat. Mar. 19, 10:27:00 p.m. 2005, Blogger Apesnake said...

She said she would not run but getting the nomination is like getting the tap on the shoulder to be the Pope. You can't act like you want it until the last moment. If she said she would run now she would spend the whole term being scrutinized as a potential president. Who needs that?

Hilary does not care if she is scrutinized because she will not be doing anything real for the next few years. Maybe all politicians could take a page out of that book.


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