Sunday, January 22, 2006

Nocturnal Emissions From the Other Side.

Batzri said that evil demons from "the other side" use nocturnal emissions to create more demons.

"Most of our troubles are caused by these demons," said Batzri. "They hurt us, they hurt our children, they cause poverty." Batzri said that the special prayer, which includes the reading of portions of the Zohar, fasting and repentance can destroy these demons.
When I went to summer camp on "the other side" we made demons out of dry macaroni, construction paper and glitter. I guess there were budget cuts and now the evil demon kids need to provide their own art supplies. I would have recommended Elmer's glue instead of nocturnal emissions but then I don't run demon camp so who am I to second guess.

2 Comments:

At Mon Jan 23, 10:12:00 AM 2006, Blogger Robert said...

Fortunately for the good rabbi, his flock will likely not ask him to justify such an outlandish claim. No, those that gravitate toward religion (generally speaking) tend to value their emotions more than their rational faculties.

Even though I argue that theism is rational, I must say that this is proof-positive that all theists are not created equal.

 
At Mon Jan 23, 03:23:00 PM 2006, Blogger Apesnake said...

I think that people have been so trained to respect religious beliefs that they do not share (mainly to avoid the sectarian violence and the tendency for the "official religion" of the head of state to oppress others that was common in the past) that there is a tendency for really bizarre beliefs to grow and flourish because people are too tolerant to point out how crazy these beliefs are until enough people of the same mindset have gathered together in an insulating layer of mutual support. Fortunately, I am somewhat less than "too tolerant".

What I find fascinating is that the fraction of people who are able to accept the really funky beliefs like demonic wet-dreams giving rise to monsters and aliens cloning humans as a slave race (robots being too expensive for aliens to manufacture when compared to interstellar in vitro projects) are so spread out into so many weird beliefs. You would not think there would be enough fringe people to fill all the fringe movements. I was once reading a book about small religions, cults and sects. It was published before Heaven's Gate became infamous but I read it after Bo and Peep jumped on the comet. I was amazed at how many cults were dedicated to UFOs. Then there are the doomsday cults the "I am Jesus" cults, the "buy our multilevel marketing products", the "quantum mechanics can give you superpowers" cults and all the overlap. I am truly amazed at the diversity of really weird beliefs out there. Not all of them are based on theism but if you call your meeting hall a church, synagogue, temple or mosque you can avoid some of the ridicule that you get if you call it a landing pad or a paranormal spa or a corporate headquarters.

 

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